I don’t know why I feel I must confess this on the blogosphere…but alas, I have something to say: One time when I was about 4 years old (I may have been 5, but that’s too close to the age of responsibility) I was at Hobby Lobby with my mom. No, that’s not the confession. Continuing–We were in the check-out line and you know how they have all those delicious candies right up at the very front so that you’ll make a last minute purchase?
Well, I decided that I needed some Winterfresh Gum. I know, I know. What kid chooses Winterfresh gum over skittles or starburst or any sort of chocolate? Heck, even tic-tacs sound better. Anyways, my mom said she wouldn’t buy me the gum. I knew how to fix that, I’d just swipe it. Swipe as in–Swiper, no Swiping. Only I did swipe. I swiped that 5-stick pack of Winterfresh gum right into my pocket and out the door. I can’t remember if my mom ever found out about that gum, but I’m thinking she did.
While I’m on the confession wagon, I should add that I love–more like used to love–free stuff. If we were at the State Fair I would go around and collect all the free pamphlets I could. Why? I have no clue. I never read them. But I would collect them and then a few months later when I was more mature I’d think to myself–why? Why am I hoarding loads of information about home remodels and insurance? I’m only seven, for goodness’ sake.
Only it didn’t stop there. My mom loved home decorating (should that have I hyphen? I dunno) and so we’d always go to fabric stores (see where Hobby Lobby came in?). I was bored, naturally, so I found something to collect/hoard. By the time my mom was done making her purchases we’d get in the car only for her to find my pockets stuffed with fabric samples. Why? Again, I can’t answer that. I had blankets. I wasn’t needy for clothes. No, my jeans didn’t have holes in them. I just liked being able to have something for free.
Nowadays, my love for free stuff has morphed into more mature gratuitous odds and ends. I have a new rule that I only accept/take something that’s free if I can and (this is the big piece) WILL use it. Pens, pencils, coffee mugs, frisbees, clip-magnet things—-yes, yes, yes, yes, and yes. Samples at Sam’s Club— double yes.
Phew. I feel much better now that you know the real me.